Backlash occurred last night (I wrote this column Monday), and it was a good but very unsatisfying pay per view. My thoughts:

X-Factor v. The Dudley Boyz was as formulaic as a Dudleyz match gets: heels win, Dudz table someone afterwards. I really hate that. Albert is completely overrated and yet somewhat skilled. I’ve never taken to Justin Credible, and my dad hates X-Pac more than anyone. X-Factor’s music, once it gets going, actually isn’t bad, but I don’t like the Dudz new music. This is every "Dudleyz v. team not named E&C or Hardyz" feud ever, and I despise it. The Dudleyz need a heel turn. Match sucked. *

Rhyno v. Raven was the greatest hardcore match I’ve ever seen. Both guys worked really hard and instead of a gay WWF hardcore match, this was more like an awesome ECW spotfest. The steps spot that both did was awesome, and Rhyno going through the shopping cart was one of the coolest spots of the night. The Rhyno push continues, and I’m happy for it. Raven carried Big Show and Kane to a decent match last month, but this was much better. ***1/2

William Regal v. Chris Jericho was stupid and pathetic. Regal and Jericho did some of their wrestling, but the styles don’t mix well, and the storyline completely overshadowed the match. The Duchess of Queensberry looked like a man. Heyman had a line during the match that had me rolling: "We haven’t had royalty here in the WWF in a long long time." Subtle jab at Lawler, obviously. But the match just didn’t mix. Regal’s facials ruled, but that’s it. When the WWF and WCW rip off the Steve Austin v. Dude Love match at Over the Edge 98, they forget that the whole atmosphere was insane, from McMahon to Austin, to the Stooges to Taker chokeslamming them through tables, from Dude’s fake teeth to the awesome crowd. No one can top that. Everyone knew who was winning this match. Jericho has completely sucked from an entertainment and comedy standpoint, and while his matches have been good against Benoit, his mic work has sucked and he desperately needs a heel turn or he has nothing. I’m sorry. **

Chris Benoit v. Kurt Angle was damn good and an awesome match. It did have its flaws, though, as the crowd was silent for most of it and Angle stalled a little too much. I called the Michaels/Hart finish right before the match, and I was right. Excellent contest, though, even if it’s not even the best submission match in that city. Considering the huge pop for the Sharpshooter, and considering that The Rock’s version of the Sharpshooter blows, Benoit should consider making the Sharpshooter a trademark or alternate finisher. That is, until I work there, because it’s my move. Yes, I’m delirious about that. Anyway, great match, but HHH/Austin, Rock./Austin, and Benoit/Jericho on the three previous PPVs were better. ****1/2

Shane McMahon v. The Big Show was a simple excuse to let Shane kill himself. No other reason. It seems we’re going to get a Test/Big Show feud, to the delight on no one. Shane dropped from around 35 feet, and it was amazing. The ether soaked rag brought me back to old Undertaker matches, which is bad, but Shane makes up for it. I think that Shane will be a wheelchair executive in the future. ***

Matt Hardy v. Christian v. Eddie Guerrero was a RAW match. A good RAW match, but a RAW match nonetheless. Even though they all rule, the Hardyz/E&C feud is played out and they should stay away from each other for a year or two. Let Christian and Edge go off as singles heels. Eddie did good, but he has no direction whatsoever and is proving that while Benoit is the next Steve Austin, the rest of the Radicalz are nothing. ***

Triple H & Steve Austin v. Undertaker & Kane was a good match, as the Brothers worked hard. Still, maybe I’m spoiled by the recent work of Triple H, Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, Chris Benoit, and The Rock, but this is not an acceptable main event for a pay per view. Kane sold well, and Taker is improving, but the fact is, the match was way too long. It’s become apparent how much Austin has become Triple H’s bitch. Really. Triple H gets the pin, Triple H is the one is the aisle gloating, and Triple H is Vince’s son-in-law. Austin is nothing compared to HHH. I’m not that thrilled with Judgment Day’s upcoming lineup, as Austin v. Undertaker will never equal the Highway to Hell main event at Summerslam 98, and they shouldn’t even try to. Also, Triple H v. Kane should be better than their horrendous WM 15 match, as Triple H doesn’t suck anymore. Triple H joins Shawn Michaels as winners of the Grand Slam. Good for him. Maybe he can win the Hardcore title due to the 24/7 rule, and then also win the Lightheavyweight title so he can claim that he’s won every belt the WWF has ever made. Then, he can win the Royal Rumble, so he can say he’s won everything the WWF has ever made. Why the hell not? It’s not like he can do anything else. ***

Overall, this was a good pay per view, but nothing special. They better improve and get some shocking and interesting stuff going on, or fans will get bored. Here’s something I’d like to see:

Tonight (4/30, if it’s published later) on RAW, have Chris Benoit come out at the start of the show and gloat about how he finally beat Kurt Angle. Have Steve Austin run out and destroy Benoit, because Austin wanted to talk first. Then, on Smackdown, have Benoit again get beat down by Austin, until Benoit attacks Triple H and Stephanie. Finally, on the following RAW, Benoit faces Austin for the WWF Title. The ref gets knocked out, and "Rollin’" hits, as Taker rides out on his bike and gives Austin the Last Ride. Ref gets up and only counts 2. Austin hits Benoit with the chair many times, only getting 2. He sets up for the Stunner, but Benoit grabs the leg, spins him around, right into the CROSSFACE! AUSTIN TAPS! NEW WWF CHAMPION!

And why should that happen next week? Simple. I’m going to RAW. And the WWF exists to make me happy, and it will even if when I hopefully work there.

I can’t begrudge Triple H for using politics to get the WWF Title a lot and get a prominent position and Stephanie; I’d be doing the same damn thing.

Later.