Recently, I learned that Metallica was planning on touring with Limp Bizkit and Linkin Park. Now, to most of you, this matters about as much as, say, Poison touring with Motley Crue, i.e not at all. But for a die-hard metal fan like me, it means that the group that got me back into music is finally completely embracing corporate attitudes, or as the kids on the street~! like to say, “selling out”. But as I consider this more, I realize this isn’t the first time they’ve done something completely hypocritical. Let’s review, shall we?

March 1983: Dave Mustaine, future lead singer of Megadeth, is punted from the band for being a drunk, basically. When you consider that James Hetfield would have problems with addictions for the next 15+ years, this is pretty ridiculous.

Now, after this pretty reprehensible act, Metallica was a pretty incredible band, making 3 consecutive seminal albums. But then the worst possible thing that could have happened, did.

Cliff Burton died.

And it all went to shit.

Sure, they recorded Justice for All and The “Black” album afterwards. But really, was the Black album a good thing? Consider this: Since recording the Black album, Metallica has not done a single useful thing musically. Load was mediocre, and ReLoad…well, that’s another column, if I have the energy to remind myself of that kind of frustration. The cute little projects they’ve done since then were fun, but it’s them playing old songs or songs written by other people. And you know, I thought, “Hey, even Iron Maiden recorded a couple bad albums, and now they sound great! No problem.” Well, I was wrong. Metallica’s been sitting on their ass the last few years, doing nothing but causing trouble, and not the good kind that amuses people or even the kind that makes one think.  To be fair it looked promising at first and that’s exactly what they were doing, making people think, when Lars Ulrich got downright vicious with Fred Durst on an appearance on Charlie Rose. Check some of these choice jabs out.

Fred Durst sits there and says, "I believe Napster is a great company and we want to go against the record companies..." Who paid for your Nookie video? Who spent $600,000 so you could have a video on MTV that made you sell $8 million dollars? You didn't pay for it yourself. –Lars

I find myself feeling a tremendous amount of hatred towards Limp Bizkit and wanting to shove them back where they came from....All I gotta think of is Fred Dursts' red baseball cap and I get very hostile.- Lars

When I saw that he said these things, I thought there might be some salvation. So, I waited patiently, hoping for a new album or at least a tour. But no, that’d be too easy. Instead, Jason Newsted left Metallica, citing medical and personal reasons. Rumours swirled around of something much bigger, or that what he meant by personal is “Metallica can kiss my ass.” Then the beans were spilled, so to speak. As it turns out, Jason was getting bored sitting around, and decided to do a side project called Echobrain. When he mentioned that he was going to release it soon, James Hetfield and Lars Ulrich (although Jason claims it was more James) had issue with this, claiming they felt wronged that Jason was doing things “outside the family”.  Feeling a little betrayed (and rightfully so), Jason announced to the band that he was officially gone. These days Jason is doing his own thing, producing and playing bass for a band out of Montreal called Voivod. They recently finished a brand new album, and look for a review of that if I can get my grubby paws on it. But I digress. Anyways, that sordid little bit of idiocy wasn’t what bothered me. The tour coupled witht his statement, did:

“We respect Fred and what he does a lot, as he does us.”-Lars Ulrich, Interview with KSJO.

Come again? Are you the same Lars Ulrich that just bashed him a while ago? And I’ve got news for you; If Fred had any respect for rock in general, he’d still be managing strippers. Because then his garbage wouldn’t be on the radio, and his relatively talented backup band would be doing something useful.  So with all this in mind, I have but one more thing to say. Metallica, no matter what this new album sounds like, no matter whom they sucker into playing bass for them, still have a legacy. What kind of legacy they have, however, is up to them.